What Is This I Don't Even

Random stuff I stumble across. Sense of humor can be described as "classy as all fuck.”
Also I like tigers, cats, dogs and basically all other animals.
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Oh and speaking of how today was kinda shitty I meant that literally.

I’ll spare you the details but the short version is that I hope that whoever was responsible for what happened in the women’s the bathroom at work was either an extremely small child or a very ill adult because otherwise that was no okay in any way shape or form. Cleanup basically involved me and one of the managers bleaching the hell out of the place while spraying as much Glade as possible into the air to make it marginally more breathable. At one point I asked if we had any Vicks vapor rub, i.e. the stuff crime scene investigators put under their noses when looking at corpses. I’m not particularly squeamish and this manager has an infant but we both thought this was incredibly bad, and the main thing we kept saying was variations on “What the fuck?!” (even funnier since I don’t think I’ve ever heard this manager swear before). But I got accolades for helping and not running away like everyone else.

Coincidentally we were later putting out some box calendars and one of the joke ones is “What’s your poo telling you?” My comment that was in the case of the bathroom earlier it was “Seek professional help!”

Question becomes “did I not make that dish correctly and that’s why it was bland or are the directions such that it was inevitable?”

Usually I’ll try making it again in case I made a mistake and then if I get the same results the second time assume it’s the recipe.

So we have a couple Wolverine Labbits on clearance at work and I kind of want to buy one due to the sheer ridiculousness of it.

Asker athenaltena Asks:
Your latest column got me thinking that it personally skeeves me out when I see someone talk about "looking for a mate" like they're some sort of wild animal, and tends to be a red flag to me that this person might not actually have a meaningful emotional relationship in mind.
athenaltena athenaltena Said:


I’m a little more forgiving, if only because I see nerds using more “analytical” terms all the time. In some ways, it’s a sort of self-defense move, distancing themselves from the immediate fear and intimidation factor that they may associate with “trying to find a girlfriend” or “getting a boyfriend”. 

That doesn’t mean that it’s not weird, mind you. And every time I see someone refer to women as “females” I keep picturing Wallace Shawn as the Grand Negus.

I also get that some people may prefer it because it’s gender neutral, but mostly whenever I hear it it gets me thinking about that one Bloodhound Gang song about the Discovery Channel and/or Australia. And yeah it’s similar to the whole “females” thing in the sense of being simultaneously clinical and dehumanizing.

Oddly, “Lifemate” ala ElfQuest doesn’t get the same reaction from me, maybe because a.) they’re elves b.) the “life” part implies commitment.

Good good. @_@

It wasn’t as bad as last time, at least, when it happened in January back when we had the sub-arctic temperatures.

Did it get fixed, or will it soon?

It was fixed by the time I got home. Thankfully everyone in the house uses the same heater so the owner had no hot water either and probably got it fixed ASAP.

First thing I woke up to this morning was finding that my hot water wasn’t working. Again. Day got marginally better but that was a shitty start.

So in addition to yet another guy at work thinking he was being very helpful by telling me to “Smile!” when I was just standing and minding my own business with a neutral expression, an action that in reality makes me want to flip you off, I had some guy creepily lean over so he could read my nametag and keep referring to me by name continuously and kept asking when my shift was over. Thankfully someone showed up to take over my register and I could make a quick exit. I checked very carefully as I was leaving to make sure I wasn’t being followed.
This came up at my other job too recently where one of the guys wondered why the women at work tend not to answer the phone using our names, i.e. “[Place of business] this is [so-and-so]” but instead just use the business name. All the women gave the same reason for not using their names: If they give their name some [male, implicitly] customers will keep injecting it into the conversation in a way that feels uncomfortable. If someone directly asks I’ll give my name on the phone but I won’t just offer it up anymore. The guys at work didn’t get this at all, how giving someone your name makes some of them think they have a measure of power over you and they’ll use it continuously to reinforce that. It’s almost like fairy tale logic in some ways.
In a word, eugh. I wouldn’t go quite so far as to say it’s exactly sexual harassment per se so much as general skeeviness and trying to dominate other people.






I loved this part. It made me think so much about the conversations that shaped my life just before and after I arrived.

Here’s what I know:
- I am Rachel Lea after my late great-grandmothers Regina and Lillian.
- I was almost Rebecca Lily.
- If I were a boy I would have been Randy.
- My father wanted boy-me to be Rhys, but my mother really did not.

Do you know whom you’re named after or what else your name might have been?


-My full name is Simini-Laurén, or Simini Laurén, as there is some dispute as to the dash. On one document it was included and other not? I’m not sure. 

-My mom had been saving the name Simini since she was 8, when she lived in a very small town and there was a woman named Simini Udall and she like the name. I’m not named after her or anything, she just liked it. Later found out Simini Udall had been an art teacher, so that’s fitting I suppose. 

-Laurén is pronounced like LaRen, and was inspired by the actress Sophia Loren, because it was 1986. (again, not named after her per se, she just liked it). 

-My mom wanted to name my Simini-Laurén Brachelle (or Michelle?) Blocker, but my dad said no way. This is also why there’s argument about the hyphentation. 

-Not sure what I would have been named had I been a boy, probably Landen like my younger brother. When I was born and they told her she’d had a girl, my mom was so excited she jumped off the table yelling “A girl! a girl!!” Or so the story goes…

When she was 7 months pregnant, my mom had a dream where a baby boy unzipped her stomach*, popped his head out, said “Hello, my name is Russell, what’s your name?” And after that my mom was convinced that I was going to be a boy and I was going to be named Russell, so they never picked out a girl’s name. 

Smash cut to the hospital and the big surprise that I was, and am, a girl. They knew my middle name would be Yates, my paternal grandmother’s maiden name, and so when they read in a People magazine left at the hospital that mediocre 80’s pop star and actress Pia Zadora had just delivered a baby girl and named her K-A-D-Y**, they decided that the two names sounded nice together and that was good enough.

*My mom is a nurse midwife, you’d think even in her dreams she would know that this is not how birthing babies works.

** Kady Zadora followed in her mother’s footsteps and is also a singer. I last saw her as a guest judge on RuPaul’s Drag Race.

I’m so glad this came up because I wanted to jump in here with this too. Because first of all, my mom did that changing the birth certificate at the last moment thing too. Added the LE in case I was a doctor, or a lawyer. I’m not, that LE never gets used. It’s much more formal and serious than I ever turned out to be. The Velvet Underground reference is much more where I live.

If I was going to be a boy, I would have been Jesse Clayton— purely so my mom could stand on the porch and yell “Jesse Clayton, you get in here out of the mud.” My mom is from Queens.

I’m loving this whole conversation, inspired by Brown Girl Dreaming and the reblogbookclub, about our parents deciding what to name us.

My dad’s proposal was apparently Sean Patrick (first and middle) after the semi-tradition of the men in the family taking the first name of the father as their middle name, so he was Patrick James since his dad was James. My mother apparently objected because we have a very Irish last name and her comment was something to the effect of “we go with that and we might as well stamp a shamrock on the kid’s forehead”. Wound up as a moot point since they found out fairly early on I was a girl. Rosemary was apparently something my mom just came up with someday and my dad liked it since it wasn’t directly naming me after any female relatives on either side, since while he likes the “give the son the middle name of the father” tradition he thinks it overly complicates things when you have more than one person alive at once with the same name since there are 3 Freds and 2 Davids among his many many cousins who often end up getting referred to with qualifiers like “the younger” or nicknames to keep them straight. Sarah was similarly just something they both liked.

(via dirtyriver)